I decided I am ready. Yup. I am excited, ready and want to get the hell out of dodge. No hesitation, no doubt, no fear. Damned the torpedoes, full speed ahead. Let’s DO THIS!
I am home on a non-Holiday Monday. I needed just one more weekend day. One more day without work. I had a good weekend with some socialization, some alone time, some target practice, packing and chores. However, the thought of going back to work made me sick to my stomach. I wish I could say literally, but not quite. However, the feelings of depression, sadness, frustration, and going to a place I do not want to be, doing tasks that I abhor caused me to degrade my ethic just a bit. In short, I could not fathom working today and know I needed to be home.
To be fair, I did check my schedule and I only had two little things that others can cover. I mean, I cover their work all the fucking time. I rarely am sick, I vacation one week at a time a couple times a year and that is all. No emergencies, no sick kids, no Monday or Friday flu. Nope, not me. I am that reliable person who does what is expected of me when and where it is expected. Lately, however, I am giving myself room. Room to take a mental health day when I really need a break. As my time to leave draws near, this will be it’s very own challenge.
So, I took today to get caught up and more settled. I had a bunch of food to cook for the week and some more things to organize. I had some weekday only phone calls to make and details to finalize. I watched movies while I prepared my meals, got situated with some of my travel supplies, paid a couple bills, and worked on some money matters. Mission accomplished and I feel great! So great, I am writing even more today.
I also talked to my Mom. We are in the routine, and have been for decades, where we talk most weekends, usually on Sunday. I did not call yesterday so I thought today would work. She also just got my Christmas presents and sent a text thanking me. Yeah, way late, but not totally my fault. We talked about many things and I think she helped me solve one of the hurdles of this undertaking. She offered for me to use their address for my mail. One of the biggest challenges for me is to retain a permanent street address in this state, let alone in the town where I live. That is a tale for another post. Anyway, Mom offered to have my mail sent to their place as a mailing address, but not my residential address. Cool! Mom offered to receive my mail, forward it when needed, and I suggested she even check it for me. I mean, what could I possibly get that would be such a great secret that she cannot look at it for me?? The mail problem may be solved.
Back to my third weekend day – Did you know that you can drink evaporated milk? I was going through my canned goods, setting aside some for the journey. I have a lot of cans of evap milk. A little research and I learned I can either use it straight or add some water and off we go. I think it would be good on oatmeal or cereal. That and I have a bout six cans already. That will sure save me when I run out of cooler space for milk. Excited to have learned that today. Excited to add that to my containers of canned goods. Let’s face it, I am just excited!
I also have a new pile of things to go into storage. Man, I still have to sell more stuff. I will not be able to keep a couch, so I will try to keep the recliner. I have to remind myself that this stuff is made every day and it will not hurt me to move into a new place and take some time to furnish it. Abundance, not scarcity, model thinking.
Wow, mission accomplished. Michelle sated. Happiness abounds. Movies, writing, no shower, lounge clothes, one or two little drinks, lots of snacks, progress on preparation, and meals cooked for the week.